Mein Kampf (My Struggle)

*I should give a disclaimer to this, but I'm not. If you're dumb enough to think that this has anything to do with any type of adoration for Hitler, you're an idiot.

No.
This is not a reverse Hitler-esque poem that cries about how blacks need a home.
No.
This is not about the African-American struggle of racism, discrimination, self-hatin', and harangues about how we will nevermake it.
No.
This is about my own individual struggle
like Hitler
but minus the bigoted gibberish about exterminating the blacks and the Jews and the gays
No,
this is about my reality, my struggle,my ways
My struggle is unique to myself but can apply to anyone else
My struggle is about me
and how I became too blind to see who I was, or am-
Because it's like damn
I lost myself like a swimmer would lose his life when the dams break
or when an entire population and culture dissipates when the levees break
and in the process of death I lost me,
my beliefs,
what I stand for,
my identity.
And no matter how hard I try and where I search,
I can't seem to find me
M.E.
What do these two letters even mean?
I must eliminate my emptiness
and most definitely eliminate my eternal misconceptions in an attempt to erase misery and emerge back into..
M.E.
Dreaming of when I was an infant and I was free
when I could just lay in bed and have everything handed to me
When I could just smile, eat, shit, and sleep all day
Now I sleep because I can't bear to face another day
because then I will wake and realize that I'm only a shell of my former, fresh out of the womb naked self
Sometimes, almost always, I feel like somebody else
Tara who?
To tell the truth
sometimes I forget my own name,
cuz ever since that day nothing has ever been the same
and it's true, things change
but what do you do when nothing that keeps you sane remains?
Guess that's why I'm going insane
It's a tug-o-war and I'm losing the game
So what's my name?
Tell me is life just a game?
before you answer that please direct me to the lost and found
even though not too deep down I know that I am lost and will never be found
I was once lost and am still lost
my vision was blurry and now I can't see
So, where the hell is my Amazing Grace?
Will I always be trapped in my struggle?
Mein Kampf
Like Hitler,
but minus the bigoted gibberish about exterminating the blacks and the Jews and the gays
No,
this is about my reality, my struggle,my ways